Monday, October 22, 2007

Da Finkers

Beaking News: NEW DELHI, India (AP) -- Wild monkeys attacked a senior government official who then fell from a balcony at his home and died Sunday.

Also I have been banned from wiki pedia for what ever reason. I did not post? Why am I banned? So I move forward offering you the best and most offensive news I can muster without real/you know facts.

Short Story Stolen From Recent email


Subject:
Da Finkers


Ole vas vorking at the fish plant up nort in Dulut
vhen he accidentally cut
off all ten of his finkers.
He vent to da emergency room in the Clinik and vhen
he got dar da Norsky
doctor looked at Ole and said, "Let's have da
finkers and I'll see vhat I can do."

Ole said, "I haven't got da finkers."
"Vhat do you mean, you hafen't got da finkers?" he
said. "Lord-it's 2007 and
Ive's got microsurgery and all kinds of incredible
techniques. I could hafe
put dem back on and made you like new! Vhy didn't
you brink da finkers?"
Ole says......"How da fock vas I suppose to pick dem
up?"

22 Comments:

At 10:51 AM , Blogger zen wizard said...

They speak their own language up there.

 
At 11:08 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

zen: ya.

 
At 12:22 PM , Blogger Toby said...

Monkeys are funny.

Josh, thanks for the comment on my blog over the weekend. I got the email(s) from your comment and the few other and I just went to reply only to find my post is gone. I'm blaming it on the monkeys.

 
At 12:53 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

Toby: Tread lightly my friend monkeys have a dark side...I hope this is not a trend or some sort of dark army monkey campaign, they are most likely responsible for your blog issues.Good monkey/bad monkey I suppose its a yen and yang monkey thang.

 
At 2:57 PM , Blogger Lee Ann said...

Have a great week!
~xo
Lee Ann

 
At 3:29 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

lee ann: Roger Wilko

 
At 1:25 AM , Blogger ~d said...

*CURIOUS! Are you reading the New Delhi Times?
Louisiana just elected an Indian-American Governor. Was wondering if the NDT say anything abt it...?

 
At 4:01 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

~d: They said nothing of your 36 year old governor. They things about monkeys, thank you very much and come again.

 
At 5:01 AM , Blogger zen wizard said...

On the Wikipedia thing, I don't know that much about it, but if I had to guess I would say that some "anti-defamation robot" thinks you maliciously vandalized an article.

 
At 5:06 AM , Blogger zen wizard said...

Here's an article about being banned from Wikipedia if you're interested.

I wouldn't sweat it too much.

 
At 8:58 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

zen: By chance do you know the name of this "anti defamation robot"? I googled something a wikipedia link was shown, I clicked it and was told I was not allowed to read the article, I tried other angles nothing, I will try again when I log on at home but your right there is a robot out their and he is persecuting the wrong man.

 
At 10:04 AM , Blogger EBEZP said...

So I said at St James Gate my buddy Josh wants a pressie from Dublin and they said will this do him Oh yes I said he doesn't drink a lot!

 
At 10:37 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

ebzep: Now that is one hell of a gift! That should hold me till Jan 1...Dude thanks JW

 
At 2:52 PM , Blogger ~d said...

(36??!)

WOW!

 
At 3:54 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

~d: Youngest gov in the states and he is all yours...LA is one progressive state contrary to popular belief.

 
At 3:59 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

"What hath God wrought" the first words out of my mouth when I discovered I was no longer banned from wikipedia...Now what? I can hold a grudge like a newborn child.Do I go after them? Do I let them rest and grow stronger? Do I go bed now? Yes, I go bed now...or in a little bit, no deadlines here at casa Josh

 
At 5:12 AM , Blogger zen wizard said...

The article says that they have "volunteers" who troll the articles and look for:

1) VAndalism;
2) Articles that people posted that no one else gives a crap about; e.g., "Biography of Richard Noe--State Farm Insurance Agent in Broken Bow, Nebraska..."

It says you can get kicked out for either reason.

("Wikipedia Volunteer Article Quality Monitor"--that's a job that could get you laid in South Beach on a Saturday night, huh??)

 
At 6:36 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

zen: It was a good article, but shite I didn't even post, I just was denied access for a day, what alleged facts where they trying to hide from me? I think they are out to get me and this is not paranoia its perception. Stay Strong JW

 
At 4:51 PM , Blogger ~d said...

Not bad for a state that had David Duke as a state representative only 15 years ago.

 
At 4:59 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

~d: I think you should take be proud and take full credit!

 
At 3:44 PM , Blogger Winters said...

I was violently banned from a strip club in Paris without ever entering (or trying to enter) the establishment. My only crime was resembling another human being.

I feel your pain. Do not allow these filthy bureaucrats to grind you down, brother.

 
At 4:06 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

Winters: In a state along time ago I was not permitted to enter a strip club just because I walked kinda off kilter. Wiki will not break me it will just make me stronger, thanks brah...

 

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