Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Before my Big Break

Before I was a hugely successful tangential book reviewer, before I was given command of a wildly successful literary site "My Mule" before all this I was a successful model. (Below is a prime example of my work as a model/ artist).
My portfolio unfortunately is owned by corporate demons so I am unable to cash in from my past success in the hopes of generating income for my philanthropic passion. I survive solely on proceeds from My Mule and Amazon while still committing 50% (low estimate) of my income to my main passion, making the world a prettier place. I continue to push the boulder up the hill, with a dash of grit and a shit bucket full of self-absorbtion someday by god I will make the world a prettier place and when I do, I will promptly forget everyone who helped me along the way!
Kind Regards JW

BONUS POST! YOU GOTTA LOVE A GOOD GOAT STORY.





35 Comments:

At 4:04 AM , Blogger Toby said...

Just for that I'm not helping you.

 
At 4:34 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

toby: Dang, I'll never forget this!

 
At 7:02 AM , Blogger Toby said...

Is this some kind of double reverse psychology?

 
At 8:04 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

toby: Of course not, I respect your stance. hehehe ...uh ignore the hehehe. JW

 
At 2:49 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

Water and Beer Education

WATER...... It has been scientifically proven that if we drink 1 liter of
water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more
than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli bacteria found in feces, in other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop!
However, we do not run that risk when drinking beer because alcohol
has to go through a distillation process of boiling, filtering and fermenting.

WATER =POOP

BEER =HEALTH

Free yourself of Poop, drink BEER!!! It is better to drink beer and talk shit than to drink water and be full of shit.

 
At 3:21 AM , Blogger Toby said...

Here here! I'll begin my beer drinking in about 8 hours and 30 minutes.

Driving through the country side and going to the zoo will fill you full of shit too. You know those odors? You're actually breathing in little particles of poop.

 
At 3:29 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

toby: Your right! I just did some research and the scientific name is shit molecules. How did you know that, so when someone farts it’s the same thing is my hypothisis.

 
At 4:20 AM , Blogger Bostick said...

If you can smell shit odor, the actual vaporized poo is in your nose. Said vaporization is a chemical process called 'shitivaporization'

 
At 4:25 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

bostick: Dude you know your shit.

 
At 9:17 AM , Blogger Toby said...

Some bird flew over and dropped the knowledge on my head. I got a free beer for it too.

 
At 10:46 AM , Blogger Phats said...

haha i love it that made me laugh thanks

 
At 12:05 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

toby: Sweeeet!

phats: thanks dude glad to hear it and thanks again

 
At 1:14 PM , Blogger Bostick said...

Getting shit on by a bird is good luck. So they say..

 
At 3:49 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

bos: They is dead right!

 
At 3:52 PM , Blogger Bostick said...

I saw the toughest dude on the beach get shit on his face by a seagull. I said "dude thats good luck!" he said "fuck off"

 
At 4:11 PM , Blogger Bunyan, Paul Bunyan said...

Lard ass.

 
At 4:13 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

bos: Now thats funny.

Bunyan: Bugger off!

 
At 4:50 PM , Blogger lee said...

brilliant photo.haha :).

 
At 3:10 AM , Blogger Erin O'Brien said...

Please post a photo of your daddy parts immediately.

Red rose petals. Istanbul. Blood.

I love you,

Erin

 
At 4:30 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

lee: Why thank ya!

Erin: I would but this is a family blog. Thanks, heart JW

 
At 8:40 PM , Blogger Me said...

I feel like I stumbled into a highschool lunchroom. That could be a compliment. Pass me that plate of greasy fries. Coincidentally I was recently shat upon by a raven whilst shopping for a ring with a raven on it. What's that mean? Never did find the ring. I think that blows your good luck theory to hell.
Josh, you make me laugh but I'm unclear, what are you/did you/imagine you did augment?

 
At 10:46 PM , Blogger Mone said...

I'm glad Bunyan didnt bring a goat over here, hahaha. Perhaps they knew there was no need to!

 
At 4:02 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

Me: It’s a compliment, Highschools are institutes of learnin'. Thus quoth the Raven " I shat on this lady who was shopping for a ring of a raven on it, isn’t that a hoot"! What does it mean me, search me? I had my ears and nose augmented. We arse I left alone.

Mone: So the Bunyans are there, Oh lord I wish you the best. Be ready for anything, ooh I just shuddered.

 
At 5:03 AM , Blogger Toby said...

I guess Sudan is lacking in the PETA department.

 
At 10:33 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

toby: I think his peta is what got him in trouble to begin with...

 
At 10:33 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 4:33 AM , Blogger Toby said...

My peta got me in trouble too. I'll be paying for that mistake for the next 13+ years.

 
At 4:47 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

toby: tell me not with a goat.

 
At 5:39 AM , Blogger Toby said...

Okay, not with a goat.

 
At 5:40 AM , Blogger Toby said...

You know, if you position a goat/sheep whatever your fancy at the edge of a cliff they will push back harder.

 
At 4:15 PM , Blogger ing said...

Toby, that is so wrong!

 
At 5:37 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

toby:OK...Yep any real man know this...

ing: it is not wrong, really.

 
At 6:40 PM , Blogger Phats said...

A kid at my high school gave a goat a blow job for 50$

 
At 6:41 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

Phats: Thats a bargain!

 
At 7:11 PM , Blogger ing said...

Beck is a vegetarian. And he is dreamy.

 

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