Sunday, December 11, 2005

I seldom tell jokes on this site

The best I can judge this car is overloaded. So maybe that is why
I included it in the post, its relevance to the joke. I seldom post
jokes, you knew this right~`

A Joke I have heard in many forms but still enjoy:

Two good ol' boys, Bubba and Earl, hired a pilot to fly them to
Canada to hunt moose. They bagged six. As they started loading
the plane for thereturn trip home, the pilot told them the plane
could take only four moose.

The Texans objected strongly. "Last year we shot six and the pilot
let us put them all on board; he had the same kinda plane as yours."

Reluctantly, the pilot gave in and all six were loaded. Unfortunately,
even at full power the little plane couldn't handle the load and went
down a few moments after take-off.

Climbing out of the wreck Bubba asked Earl, "Any idea where we are?"

"Yeah, I think we's pretty close to where we crashed last year."


At 10:36 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

i loved your joke, the photograph helped me understand it ... i think all jokes should be illustrated so they are more easily understood by the reader ... the use of the pondercation point aroused me ... this shall be my farwell to you my friend, i am leaving for my home this evening ... i never really got used to the color of the sun in your universe and i am dreadfully homesick ... josh, you have NO idea of how much your mannerisms are like your great great grandfather's - he would have been so very proud !... billyboy -OUT!

At 10:56 AM , Blogger Phats said...

haha nice joke!

I'll take that car if it runs, and has a radio.

At 11:44 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

I dont know if it has a radio. Cash up front though.

At 2:41 PM , Blogger Calzone said...

dumb fucking Texans

At 2:52 PM , Blogger Mike said...

Great Joke!

At 4:57 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

calzone: yep
Mike: yep

At 5:19 PM , Blogger Mike said...

Can I give you a bit of advice to help wtih your template? When you post, and review click view, text size and choose "smallest" on every post. I had blogger for a while and had the same problem. That seems to fix the error.

At 5:20 PM , Blogger Mike said...

But if you want a really hi tech, yet free blog, switch to Blogsome. It is more advanced, yet worth it and free. I switched because my blog site got hacked into!

At 5:43 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

Thnaks Mike for the info, I'll do a little research. For now I am going to retire to the couch and read from the printed page, work looms and...Oh God! Thanks again

At 8:09 AM , Blogger kellywalters said...

fucking hilarious!!!!!!

I've seen a car at walmart blow out its axel ..

I love it..

At 10:47 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

Thankee Roxi!

At 11:19 AM , Blogger Javier said...

I just noticed that candi is one year older than you!!

At 11:40 AM , Blogger josh williams said...

Its all in how young young you...I was out with my Aunt and we was snapping string beans and my first wife said to me go get your cane pole theres fish in the flood and so I was in the war and I got a promotion cause I was so good on a horse and thank you MR President. JW

At 11:58 AM , Blogger Javier said...

Are you under Probation or something?

At 12:31 PM , Blogger FFFrapgirl said...

LMFAO at that joke!!!!! Good one!

At 1:34 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

Double secret probation.

At 2:24 PM , Blogger FFFrapgirl said...

Don't speak of DUI probation! I am on it!

At 2:55 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

josh ... do you REALLY want me to leave? ... i have only had good thoughts about you, i fear if i leave now that we waste the potential of a wonderful friendship ... however, my respect for you is so large that i shall do what you suggest ... billyboy

At 6:04 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

Candi: I am not on any sort of probation have a number of friends who are and by the grace of god I live near a village of pubs if the mood strikes me... I was just joking with javier, about being unable to live near schools.
Anonymous: Yep you sure have a funny name and imagination.

At 6:48 PM , Blogger Phats said...

I am tired, I was hoping for a new joke, got any?

At 7:19 PM , Blogger josh williams said...

Phats: I am tired to this is all I can muster.


1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto. The blockage will be almost instantly removed.

2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply using the sink.

4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

5. A mousetrap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.

7. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget about the toothache.

Remember the rules of life:

You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape.
If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40.
If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom.

If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You get another chance.

Be nice to your family and friends; you never know when you might need them to empty your bedpan.


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